I love surprises. And I love it when a birthday party is actually a secret wedding.
And I am really good at keep secrets
When my gorgeous friend Koral and her main man Pat decided to tie the knot, they wanted no fuss.
With 4 kids, all under 6, I am not surprised. We had talked about them getting married at some point, but when she rang to tell me it was happening, it was all hush hush.
Secret weddings are not some masterful way at keeping people uninvolved or in the dark. It's mainly about cost. Not everyone can afford even a few thousand dollars, especially when you've got kids - which I guess is why couples are eloping, opting for pop up weddings....and surprise weddings.
And honestly, not everyone is a big event type of person. I have had plenty of brides and grooms who really are uncomfortable with the limelight, or have anxiety around people focussing on them.
That wasn't the case here though: Koral and Pat aren't exactly shy flowers :)
I've performed quite a few surprise weddings. And just like any other event - they are all different. And beautiful.
Backyard BBQ with friends and family. No hassle, no fuss, kids running everywhere, people laughing and having a few drinks.
I didn't know too many people there, however people knew of me through Koral and I having worked together, so I didn't feel as though my presence was terribly noticeable. But I can never seem to relax properly before a wedding, even if I appear calm and in control outwardly.
Also in the back of my mind was the knowledge that there were two other marriage celebrants in attendance. Jen, Pat's dads partner, who knew what was going on. And Koral's mum. Who was about to be surprised. Both lovely ladies.
Nothing like a bit of pressure lol.
The Ceremony
Surprise! Laughter! Smiles! Kids!
' You have already begun the journey: you have already decided that you have a connection that is unlike any other relationship in your lives. You share parenthood of 4 beautiful children. This ceremony is the formal recognition of that relationship, the celebration of you both as individuals and as a couple. '
Simple sweet, and with their kids close by. A ceremony that was very 'them'.
Everyone quickly changed from party mode into focused wedding mode - a subtle difference, but important under the circumstances. Sometimes it can be like herding cats, mixing alcohol, food and people relaxing on their days off and asking them to pay attention. It wasn't an issue here, and people loved the surprise element.
Their children were part of it all. Loki, Raven, Cain and Slade, because even at your wedding, you are still parents.
It was a beautiful ceremony and day overall. Koral and Pat looked gorgeous and so happy, which is my biggest reward as a friend and celebrant.
This couple have been through a lot. Their relationship and the family they have created is a strong commitment that existed even before I had the honour of declaring them to be husband and wife.
Koral is like the little sister I never had, even though in age, she could almost be my daughter. She is a beautiful, strong, kind hearted woman, a fantastic mum and friend. She has found her match with Pat, who is Nightwing to her Harley.
'You will never be sad. You will never be lonely. You will always have me to dance with.'
Yes, I know Joker said that - but stop being pedantic you fanatics!
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